scars from the past

No fate but that we make…questions about the way forward

(Note: although I “published” this post on my blog in September 2017, I actually began drafting the first part of it a few months ago…sharing that detail in case any parts of the post seem “dated.”) When I was a little girl I liked the “Terminator” movies. (And I liked the Rocky movies, and I …

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Second chances? Hell to the naw!

I’m one of those people who fail to respect their own boundaries. The type that falls prey to wishful thinking, to hopefulness, to forgiving too easily. I advise others not to do this, but I struggle to internalize this concept in my own life. So while I am not a big fan of “Do as …

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Love is NOT enough: choose you

I used to have a pair of earrings that I absolutely loved. These earrings were perfect. They were casual enough for everyday wear yet elegant enough for special occasions. They were long enough for me to be able to feel their “swish, swish” sound when I moved my head, but not too long. They were …

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When Love Hurts: A Story of Surviving Abuse

Content warning: post mentions physical abuse, emotional abuse, infidelity, emotional anguish, dysfunctional marriage, miscarriage, substance use, mention of suicidal ideation, divorce, faith Once upon a time there was a 14 year old girl. She met a boy her age, and they connected. And on and off for the next 13 years, more on than off, …

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Black text on white background that states: "I just need a break from life." Source unknown.

Maybe a break? Maybe not?

Weird title, I know… So if you’ve followed my blog for a while you probably know that writing is my therapy. I write when I’m happy. I write when I’m upset. I write to make sense of things. I write even when things don’t make sense… Right now, a lot of things in my life, and about …

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Don’t Be Like Me: A Letter to My Daughters

The best piece of advice I have for my daughters? Don’t be like me. Many people look up to their parents; even want to be like them. I’m your mother. I know you love me. You admire me. In some ways you are already somewhat like me. I know you aren’t going to understand me. …

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Scorpion and frog from Coast Breeze News

Not Your Nature, Your Choice: Abuse, Life, and the Scorpion and the Frog

Most people know the fable about the Scorpion and the Frog. In case you don’t, a scorpion coaxes a frog to carry him across the river since the frog can swim and the scorpion cannot. The frog is skeptical at first, but the scorpion pleads convincingly, appealing to the frog’s sense of duty. The scorpion …

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All I Have, All I Am

“Don’t tell me that this isn’t real. Don’t tell me this ain’t how I feel. This is all I have. All I have…” –NF “All I Have”(video) This is my first blog post of 2017. And I’m writing it out of…I’m not sure which emotion, truthfully. I guess a mix of them. Frustration. Sadness. Anger. …

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girl, memory, sad

The treacherous journey from foster to future

The real “f” word is not the four letter one.  It is a word that appears benign But in actuality is far more profane than the other. It’s a six letter “f” word. You probably know it… “Foster.” As in “foster” child. Image is a graphic that describes many troubling statistics of children in US …

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earth desert dry hot

When the words dry up

I can speak. Loudly. Boldly. Even eloquently. Always quickly. Often peppered with examples or stories Or with seemingly endless questions. Words can flow out of my mouth with relative ease It seems. That’s what they all think. That’s what they all say. That’s what they all believe. I know better, though. It’s an illusion. Because …

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