trauma

girl, memory, sad

The treacherous journey from foster to future

The real “f” word is not the four letter one.  It is a word that appears benign But in actuality is far more profane than the other. It’s a six letter “f” word. You probably know it… “Foster.” As in “foster” child. Image is a graphic that describes many troubling statistics of children in US …

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Ode to Foster Care

(There are many loving, giving foster parents and some decent programs out there too. This poem is not about you; it’s about everyone/everything else.) They call it foster “care.” But nothing about it is “caring.” And the only thing that it fosters Is a sense of despair Worthlessness Fear  Hopelessness Mistrust And eventually, apathy. The …

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STOP KILLING US/Disability Day of Mourning/#Disabled Lives Matter/#DDOM

This post is about Disability Day of Mourning. But before I can post about that, I need to share something else first. I promise you it will make sense when I tie it all together. (At least it makes sense in my head…) When I think back about some of my thoughts (and comments) from …

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Gratitude/Update (#NoGroupHome)

Not too long ago, I sent out a desperate plea for help. My family was (is) faced with one of the most difficult situations we’d ever encountered, and we did not have the means to handle it alone. (Many of you might be familiar with the situation; but for those who are not, this link will …

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To my sons

To my sons My beloved sons Your smiles are etched into my mind, my soul, my heart. Your laughter is my favorite song. Fierce, feral, deep love for you courses through my veins Beats in my chest Fills my lungs. My precious sons If only you could know how much you are loved How much …

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So…that sucked.

Hi everyone. It happened. It was horrible. And it’s going to happen again, soon (date not yet confirmed).  It was NOT what I expected; it was WORSE.  I have a headache from endless crying, but I think I needed to get it out. I was sad. Now I’m mad. I’m mad because the truth is …

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thank you heart text

Heartfelt thanks & slight update

Dearest friends, (I hope you all don’t mind a blog post as an update.  I know it’s not the same as responding to people individually, but it’s all I am able to manage right now. I hope you can all “feel” my heart through my words.) When I tentatively rejoined/reconnected with the “real world” today …

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I Lied to Them

I lied to them. Over two years ago when we finally brought them home, after all those years of bureaucracy and fighting to make it happen. They were finally home. Home. I wrapped my arms around them and told them this was their home. Their mom. Their dad. Their siblings. They’d never have to leave; …

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